Joke of the day

[Adam Saarinen 0]

Maybe i was in Florida birdwatching?:-)

[FlaFly 0]

Come on guys... this thread has gone from funny, to risqué, to downright offensive. Let's put it to rest.

[Hatchet Jack 0]

What's green & Irish and sits on your lawn in the summer time?

 

Why, it's Paddy 'O Furniture.

[Guest rich mc]

actually the joke goes what is irish and stays out all night. either way everyone is Irish today rich mc

[artimus001 0]

Come on guys... this thread has gone from funny, to risqué, to downright offensive. Let's put it to rest.

agreed.

[Hatchet Jack 0]

Poor Murphy.

 

Picture a humble farmhouse. In the bedroom lies Murphy the cobbler on his death bed. Father O’Malley has given the good man his last rites and the room is quiet as he slips in and out of consciousness. Then, a wonderful aroma of cinnamon and sugar wafts up beneath Murphy’s nostrils and enlivens him. The smell of Mrs. Murphy’s scones baking is so tempting, it makes the dying man sit upright in bed.

With all of his remaining strength, Murphy pulls himself across the house into the kitchen and there, piled high on the table are mounds and mounds of perfect golden brown scones, hot out of the oven. Murphy inhales deeply, a beatific smile spreads across his face. With his last ounce of strength he approaches the table and with a shaking hand reaches for one of the scones…

 

 

 

‘WHAP!’, a wooden spoon comes down hard across his hand.

 

“Feck off! Those are for the funeral!” shouts Mrs. Murphy.

[shoebop 0]

[artimus001 0]

^^^^^^LOL^^^^^^

[mikechell 0]

The secret ... to big fish (pictures) ... is out !!!

 

[Hatchet Jack 0]

Mutt & Jeff were out one evening, casting streamers along the weed beds for muskies.

Down the shoreline they suddenly heard a woman screaming and a little dog yapping,

with sounds of splashing water, then silence followed by sobbing cries.

 

They quickly rowed over to her pier and asked, “Lady, what the hell happened?”

 

“Well my little dog and I were just sitting here, playing in the water and a muskie came up and ate my little Fifi!”

 

The two men looked at one another and

then Mutt yells back to the lady,

 

“OH YEAH?

WHAT COLOR WAS SHE?”

[Rocco 0]

True story.

 

Way back in my competitive bass fishing mode, my partner and I were at a Buggs Island restaurant where a guy was bemoaning the loss of friend who crashed his car over a guard rail into the lake.... "New structure" my partner said.

 

We never went back.

 

wunbe

[Adam Saarinen 0]

shoebop! I still laugh my guts out when i look at that! Thankyou!!!

[mikechell 0]

I could watch this on AOL, where Wife sent it to me. But I can't watch it here anywhere else because this is, of course, my work computer. SO I don't know if this is the full version or not. But it IS very funny, especially if you're like me and can't stand children.

 

[essequamvideri 0]

Mikechell,

 

Want to say "Thank You for this". Extremely twisted and funny! However, I'm trying to explain to my boss why I have soda stains on my mustache and down the front of my shirt. I just can't seem to find the words to say it is from the soda coming out my nose while watching this.

 

So again, Thank You.

 

Michael

[mikechell 0]

LOL ... You are very welcome. If I'd been drinking something when I watched it, I'd have the same explanations to make.