Gen. Jubilation T. Cornpone

Boys, I thinks we's bein' duped heah - if'n this yung'un is a BEGINNAH, like he says, then I'll eat my Stetson!!! Nice- I say, very nice work y'all's doin' theah, Son!!! Son, if'n y'all has thet fancy flatlander camera t'take photographs of all y'all's beeyootiful work, then y'should do step-by-steps and post 'em in the database! Y'all're doin' some terrible fine work theah, boy!!!

"puts me back in de water, ye shifless skonk!...y'all messes wif me, 'n ize gwine t' sic Mammy Yokum 'n all them 'beeyootiful' Dogpatch wimmin on yo' sorry Kaintuckie backside - ah ain't no magic carp, you ain't no magic fishin' man, 'n if'n y'all caint do no better'n mah sorry carcass, then y'all deserves t' be beholdin t' one o' them FINE Dogpatch ladies! Oh, and by's the by - Ah ain't talkin' 'bout no Moonshine McSwine 'n Daisy Mae, neithuh - they's too good lookin' & deelectable fo' y'all's sorry, mizzable countenance..." BDH is so shaken by all this, he cries out "DFix, HELP ME, O, HELP ME, I'S SORE AFRAID - HOW DO I ...?"

Down 'Bama way, we still go after cats the old fashioned way- reach down into the hole, wait for 'em to latch on and yank 'em out! But seriously, Son- If you can bump a sculpin, crawdad or long, leechy type worm pattern over the bottom of the crik or your pond, long's it's got some marabou t' swim 'round, y'all're gonna come up big!

Gen. Jubilation T. Cornpone heah! I jes' thought I'd drop in and give a hearty Howdee to y'all!!! Lookin' fo'ward to all y'all's kind indulgence and info'mation!